How to: Be a Hero (Tips from a Professional)

A vast portion of my life knowledge comes from surrounding myself with smart people.  One of those people is my nephew, now seven years old.  Through those years, he has taught me some simple but valuable lessons on being a hero.  Allow me to share some of his tips with you. (Quotations are made in the native dialect of a five-year-old with a heart-melting speech impediment. Translations are provided for clarity.)

1. Identify and maintain the source of your strength. (Even if it involves compromised hygiene*.)

"You know da thuperpowerth dat I have? Wew...If I bruth my teef, da toofpathte will det rid of dem! A thuperhero wiffout powerth tannot thave da world."

Translation: "You know the superpowers that I have? Well...If I brush my teeth, the toothpaste will get rid of them!  A superhero without powers cannot save the world."

Sorry, mom. Looks like bedtime protocol has been trumped.

2. Know your limitations.

After slipping into his new Superman pajamas, he heard some neighborhood kids yelling outside. 

"I'm thorry I tan't help dothe people. I'm Thuperman and I have to doe potty. Thuperman tan't potty and rethtue at da thame time."

Translation: "I'm sorry I can't help those people. I'm Superman and I have to go potty. Superman can't potty and rescue at the same time."

Sometimes tough choices must be made.

3. Never underestimate the potential in others.

"Who'd win, mom? Hult or Warry da Table Duy?"

Translation: "Who'd win, mom? Hulk or Larry the Cable Guy?"

Everyone has something to offer. Beneficial allies can be found in the most unexpected individuals. 

4. Seek the best instructors. 

Seth brought this picture home from his Sunday School class that he had colored.

"Dethe are da blue ninthath and dethe are da red ninthath...and Jethuth ith teatthing dem how to fight!"

Transation: "These are the blue ninjas an these are the red ninjas...and Jesus is teaching them how to fight!"

Okay, so it may be a different kind of war, but when learning to fight evil, what better example is there than that of the Ultimate Hero?

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That ought to give you a pretty good start.  Now, let's all get out there and be heroes!  Heaven knows the world needs more of them...